Positive thinking, please

Without getting into it, my mother is not well. Please say prayers, light a candle or send positive healing thoughts in the direction of northeast Pennsylvania for my beautiful mommy. She could use all the help she can get.

Thank you.

Slightly freaky mail

When I was nearly 12, my brother Brian got a dog. Our beloved beagle mix, Lady, who was with the family since before I was born, had recently passed and a dog-free home just didn't feel right. I think we had to do a lot of begging and pleading with mom for permission, but eventually she consented and a group of us ventured off to the SPCA for a pooch. Brian quickly settled on the pup of choice, a raccoonish looking dog who was clearly the leader of her littler. Brian's girlfriend, Sharon, paid all the fees and we came home with a fluff ball of puppy. She was curious and had boundless energy, and she quickly found where we kept the food. This, along with her coloring, led to her name--Rascal. She was, according to the sign, poodle and shepherd mix, but we suspected there was terrier of sorts mixed in.

Rascal was a great dog. Although not as smart as Lady (a truly gifted dog), she was so cute and affectionate that you just couldn't get mad at her. She made friends everywhere. Rascal loved water and snow. Boy did she love snow. She would catch snowballs in her mouth and chomp them to pieces. She was also a tomboy, cocking her leg to pee in a very unladylike manner. I loved this dog so much. Eventually, a series of mild strokes left her incontinent and unable to move well, and we had to have her put to sleep. My mother, who pretends she doesn't love animals but is really an old softy, couldn't do it alone, and in the end, couldn't do it at all. I had to take her in and be brave so as not to spook her as I handed her over to the technicians and said goodbye. It was one of the hardest things I have done. (you may want a tissue now. I know I do).

So, you can imagine my reaction when I came upon this postcard in the mail.Our Rascal had less black on the face as she aged, and the black on her body didn't extend that far down the sides, she was more tan, but otherwise, this is pretty much what our dog looked like. I just stood and stared at this card. Wow!

But in the interested of helping a broken-hearted pet owner, this Rascal was lost in the area of Gower Avenue and Afton Place on December 27th. It's a male, about 35 pounds and "smallish." The card says Cairn terrier mix. If you see him, please call Mary Bess at (323) 962-1531. There is a reward offered.

Test Anxiety and an amusing anecdote

I did it. I finally took the Jeopardy online test. It is hard to get the answer and type it in 15 seconds, y'all. I choked a bit. I don't know how many I missed, as they don't give you a score. The only way you know that you passed the test is if they invite you to audition. I'll let you all know if I get a call back. Then you can help me come up with some witty banter and something catchy in my bio. Somehow I don't think "I work all day and knit all night" is going to get me on the show. However, if I do get on, I promise to knit a fingerstache for Alex, because I preferred his more roguish look.

In order to take said test, I had to be logged on by 5:30ish, so I left work early to make sure I got home in time. I made it by 5:20, but was stonewalled by the Latina Gladys Kravitz downstairs. She told me about an incident that occurred on Monday, when Roy's package arrived. It seems she had gone grocery shopping and left a few bags on the front porch while she carried the rest in and stopped to pee. In the brief time that she left them unattended, someone came up on the porch and stole her groceries along with some bags of recycling she had sitting there.

Okay, that's not the amusing part. I'm not that cold.

The thieves, according to the mechanics across the street who work on the police cars, also attempted to steal my package from Roy. One can only assume it was too bulky and awkward for them to get away with, because they put it back. Roy's impressively overdone packaging saved the day! But it sucks that Gladys lost her groceries.

She told me that one day last week someone was knocking on our doors at 11pm (I didn't hear anything even though I was home). When she came to the door to see who it was, they said, "Open the door; we'd like to talk to you about Jesus." She didn't open the door, obviously. I mean, who wants to talk about Jesus at 11:00 at night? But when she spoke with the police on Monday to report her groceries stolen, she told them about the strange nighttime evangelists. They told her if it happens again, to not speak to them, but call the police instead. There have been reports of home invasions recently. Me and my mostly-windows front door are suitably spooked. I think I'll invest in a security chain...or two. And Gladys swears they knocked on my door first. Why didn't I hear it? What if they broke in while I was napping on the sofa? Creepy, creepy creepy.

Well, now I'm just hungry

Damn you, Mary Maxim. I got an email about a yarn sale (dangerous enough on its own) but the accompanying picture...Nom nom nom....baby feets...so delicious. Don't you just want to nibble those tiny toes?

Can you tell I'm having a hormonal week?

Good things come in gigantic packages

After my fiasco at the DMV last week, I had an appointment today for 3pm. I got there at 2:30 and there was a huge line, but I eventually got to a window. Instead of issuing me one of those red squares with a number (essentially, the time you have to get your tags), I was told I could have a permit for one day of operation only and I had to "pick the day." Arbitrarily? I picked today, obviously. But that meant I had to get my smog check today and come back to the DMV tomorrow with proof to get my tags. Woo Hoo! Luckily, there's a smog check station right around the corner from the DMV, so Jamie got checked and passed. And I have $4 left in my checking account. Yippee!

All told, it wasn't so bad. I was home by 4:25. And what did I find when I got home? A huge box on my front porch. Is it a bomb? I was kind of afraid.Not expecting anything, I assumed it was another errant package for this Laura gal who just moved and got her new address incorrect. Imagine my delight when I read the label and discovered it was from my nephew, The Roy. Despite its size, it was very light. Good thing, too, because I was already loaded down with my knitting bag and a box of work to catch up on. I sliced and diced through the duct tape, and found a plethora of packing materials.Digging, I found...a wooden spoon? More digging led to this amazing item--The Auntenna.It's a homemade antenna for my HD converter box that is supposed to help me get more channels with less adjusting. Roy found the plans online somewhere, except the plans called for a 2 x 4. You have to appreciate The Roy's ingenuity. The spoon really makes it. I am happy to report that the Auntenna (get it? He made it for his aunt) works great. It works so well, in fact, that a helicopter just went over the house and I did not lose reception. My fellow HD box users will know what I'm talking about. Oh, sure, it's a bit of an eyesore, but that's part of its charm. I put it on the floor next to the TV stand, but back and out of the way, and I get almost every channel available without having to adjust it. Wheeee!

But wait! It gets better. Inside the giant box was a smaller box. Inside that was homemade Chex Mix from the lovely Jess (The Roy's squeeze), along with a cover for my beloved Kitchenaid mixer, also made by Jess,some gorgeous and oh-so-soft alpaca yarn from the Bully Hollow Alpaca Farm in Pennsyltucky,and an adorable little alpaca finger puppet. "Me love my new pet," said the Frankenstein monster.

OMG, this chex mix is delicious.

I'm sharing this with you because that's what Aunts do.

Here's a link to my nephew's blog (The Roy). It's a good piece. Enjoy.
http://dmye.blogspot.com/2010/01/summer-pretzel.html

So close, my little Jamie

The boss was working from home yesterday, so it seemed the perfect day to sit at the DMV to get Jamie street legal. No, I didn't make an appointment. The closest appointments were weeks away and I need this stuff taken care of pronto. Besides, I have good luck getting there early and taking a number. Clearly, my luck is changing.

First off, raining like crazy when I set off to drive the short distance to the DMV office on Formosa. I was nearly rear-ended twice by people who don't understand the concept of slick roads. The parking lot at this DMV is ridiculously small, so there was a line of traffic waiting patiently for the parking lot attendants to direct us to the next available spot. I finally got inside and got my number--B070. Not too bad, but it meant a wait of about 53 minutes. I sat, I tweeted, I watched people (always a good time). Then, the system went down and the wait time because indefinite. I trotted out to my car to get my knitting bag and decided to sit it out.

The pattern I'm knitting calls for double-pointed needles and I-cords, and leaving the stitches on the needles and such. Only, I was short a needle. Crap! I MacGyvered a needle out of a pencil in my purse, impressing or confusing my admiring crowd, only to discover after the fact that the needle was with me all along.
Finally, they told us the problem was statewide and no one could say when the system would be online again. They called for people to line up to make appointments for Monday, so that's just what I did. I have an appointment for 3pm on Monday. Let's hope my little car stays under the radar until then.

In other news, lest you think I just cleaned on Saturday and have been resting since, I have kept the trend going. I have not allowed dishes to sit in the sink at all. I find myself picking up pieces of fuzz that dare offend my lovely red carpet. I put a small trash can at the bottom of the stairs to collect all the fliers and stuff that come addressed to Occupant (I really wish he would file a change of address so I quit getting his mail) and then take them out on trash day. And last night, I undertook perhaps the biggest challenge of all. I took all the knitting patterns that I have printed out from Ravelry, Knitty, and various other sources, separated them by type (hat, scarf, sock, etc) and filed them in three large binders.I feel so good about this, you have no idea. Also, when am I going to knit all that?