Sunday Surprise!

STRESS RELIEVER MAN!

(I added the chest hair. He seemed to need it.)

Sometimes there's pie

I must have been exhausted from this incredibly frustrating week, because after I moved the car this morning, I went back to bed and didn't get up until 4:15. I went to the kitchen, made some breakfast/lunch/dinner, and sat on the sofa to watch Alice in Wonderland (the Tim Burton one). I fell asleep again as soon as it was over and woke up in time to move my car again at 9:30. Truth be told, it should have been moved sooner but the parking gods have been good to me lately.

Upon my return to the upstairs, I immediately changed back into my pajamas, changed the DVD to The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, and sat down with some roasted seaweed to snack on...but I wanted something sweet. And that is why I decided to bake an apple pie at 10:05pm. It's in the oven right now. I can't wait. But I will, because it won't be done for another 15 minutes or so, and then I'll have to let it cool. I'd probably have been better off just eating an apple.

While I'm here, can I rant for a minute? [wait, it's my blog; I can do whatever I want.]
So, there's a new neighbor. I think it's a woman because that's who I've seen through the window. No, I'm not a pervert peeking in the windows. There are no curtains and she's living in the garage. Yes, the garage. I've lived here for 11 years and that garage has been in the process of being converted since I moved in. The pre-Frau owners couldn't get the permits, then it didn't pass inspection, and last I heard, Frau was considering making it a laundry room, an idea I was behind 100%. But last week, on Wednesday I believe, I came home to find a car and truck in the driveway and obvious moving in activity.

Okay, the rant is not about the garage becoming an apartment. It's about the car in the driveway. It's been there since Wednesday. How does this Jenny-come-lately get to park in the driveway? Everyone else has to park on the street. I'm paying a fortune in parking tickets and this chick gets the prime spot? No one, in 11 years, has ever had permission to park in the driveway. Rasta Pasta was the only one who ever attempted it and that's because he was ballsy and the previous landlady was scared of him. Maybe she was only granted permission for the moving in and is taking advantage of it while she can. Maybe she's paying extra (I'd pay extra had the option been offered). Maybe she's related to the Frau. Whatever the case may be, it kind of sticks in my craw.

Oooo, pie's done!!

If I could...

If I could, I would buy a reset button. I would reset to last night and stop for gas on the way home, instead of having to get gas on the way in at the more expensive station.

If I could, I would hit that reset button again and strenuously avoid the phone call first thing this morning that set the mood for the whole day.

If I could, I would hit the reset button yet again and take a different route to Starbucks. I would arrive a few minutes sooner than I actually had and most likely have my coffee order in hand before that guy with four venti sticky cappulattemochachinos spilled his entire tray all over the place effectively halting all drink production and making me late for the meeting.

If I could, I would hit the reset button and send Linda for coffee instead. I'd get the fruit from the sidewalk vendor and be sitting pretty in the conference room while she helped the sweet old lady mop coffee off her blouse.

If I could, I would hit the reset button another time and check the recorder for battery power so that I didn't have to get up during the meeting, find a battery, and miss some very crucial information.

If I could, I would hit the reset button and ask the boss who all was in the lunch meeting so that I wasn't short on lunches.

You know what? If I could, I would hit the reset button one last time...and then I'd call in sick. Today just wasn't worth it.

Were you as frustrated as I was today?

I think the heat is making folks stupid, myself included. It started in traffic. I got behind this mini van driven by a woman wearing sunglasses, with both visors down, and still shielding her eyes from the sun. She was going 5 mph and then would stop dead in the middle of the road as it to check to see if the road was still there or if perhaps she were about to drive off a cliff. Arrrgghhh!

For the last two days, the A/C in our building was out. Today, the A/C was on in spades. It was so cold in our offices that my fingers were numb. I had to run them under hot water to thaw them out to finish recreating a document I messed up. I wanted to say something about how cold it was, but our maintenance guy was so pissed at us for complaining he probably would have kicked me in the teeth.

Fortunately, the ladies at the Farmer's Market for Stitch 'n' Bitch were delightful and made me laugh despite the fact that I was sweating my tatas off.

I really don't give myself enough credit

Today, I spent the better part of the morning getting a bunch of stuff together for a meeting. It was stuff that I don't normally have a hand in, but since we're shorthanded these days, each of us is wearing a multitude of hats. While my ignorance of the subject was frustrating (to me and, I'm sure, to others), I managed to figure out what I was doing and together we were able to put together all necessary information and sent the boss on her merry way.

Then, I set about fixing a document which was lost, then exported into Word from a PDF, which created a boatload of formatting errors. Was it frustrating? You bet. I cursed, more than a few times, the person who lost the original document and the fact that I was the one now saddled with the task of fixing it. I have other work to do--work that I'm sure the boss would consider a higher priority--but this is a priority, too. At one point, someone was on my computer and accidentally closed the document I had already spent an hour reformatting. I wanted to scream. Instead I calmly said, "That's okay. I can find it again with 'recent documents'." Of course, the changes didn't save and I had to start all over again, but what's a girl to do (besides save often).

Late in the day, there was a problem with the boss's computer and I worked with the IT guy to try to fix it. I was on the phone and trying to log in, trying to explain the error, and trying to tell the boss that she'll have to stay off her emails for the night. (ha!)

What really struck me as I was driving home at 8:30pm was this...I was extremely patient today. A lot of what I did today was ridiculously frustrating and unnecessary if someone had just not done this or done that. Yet, I think I kept my usually sharp tongue in check. Also? I know a whole lot more than I think I do. I DO know how to format things. I DO know a little about IT. I should really stop selling myself short. After all, no one else is selling me, short or otherwise.

Judge Porn Star

Is there a rule that says polling place workers have to be cranky and condescending? Look, Lady. My booklet said Green Table. It is not my fault y'all decided otherwise. It's not a big deal to say, "Oh, maybe you're at that table." Also, my name? Ridiculously common. So, why does it take them fifteen minutes to find it on the list. Anyway...I voted! Did you? I have to admit that while I was up on the major offices and propositions, I had no clue about the judges and other little offices. Is it wrong that I voted for a judge because his name sounds like a porn star? I mean, seriously, what image does the name Randy Hammock conjure up for you? Me? I see a guy who looks kind of like this but sounds like this. Don't Google images of the real Randy. It'll ruin the fantasy.

I sure hope he wins.

Rabbit, Rabbit

November is here!!! I love November. I love the way it sounds. I love the way it feels. I love the holidays it contains. I love that my birthday is a mere 22 days away. I love November!!

Since this is my birth month (Chrysanthemums and Topaz) and since I totally dropped the ball in September, I'm going to blog every day with NaBloPoMo. And the theme for November is there is no theme! My kind of theme, I tell ya. That just gives me free reign to babble incessantly (as if I needed permission).

Today is also the birthday of Mr. Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I always thought it was funny that his birthday was the first of the month because I never knew anyone whose birthday was actually the first of the month, except Cabbage Patch Kids. All Cabbage Patch Kids had birthdays on the first of the month. Mine (yes, I had one)(yes, I was too old to have one) was September 1st. (It was a gift from a friend because it "looks just like you did in first grade.")(Don't you judge me.) Anyway, Happy Birthday, Anthony, and anyone else born this fine day.

(I'm feeling very parenthetical today)