Hillbilly Poetry

In checking my Postini for missed emails, I found the usual plethora of bedroom enhancement drugs, lottery winning announcements, and password hacking warnings.  But interspersed were the strangest subject lines I'd ever seen.  I started reading them and they sounded like random quotes from some colloquial short story.  And so, I present to you, Hillbilly Poetry.

Greetings, My Beloved

I thought this might be in yer interest

But the words wouldn't come

He was awful surprised

It made me shiver

Oh, he done it admirable

Before un you claims it

Thems the very words

I hain't got no money

Why, yonder he is now

He said that would do

That cheered me up

But I never said so

I didn't mean no harm

I was tangled good, now.

It was a close place

Tom said so himself

My Boss thinks I'm kind of a big deal

They all do

Well, then

He was drunk, I reckon

I throwed the paddle down

I whooped and I listened

There, now, that's a specimen

Only they? They told you would

Po little chap

We blowed out a cynlinder head

Oh, he's sly, I reckon

They hain't go it

So, she hollered

Anybody would

Not by a blame sight

That disturbed Jim, and me, too

The family was at home

Phillip, never forget a movie trailer you like

Sponsored by sinus medication that makes me loopy, and cramps, and hunger, and lack of coffee.