Some days I wonder how I function

I got cable and internet at my house yesterday!! I haven't had cable TV since 1999, and I've been without any kind of TV or internet at home for at least 9 months.  I've been doing a lot of Netflix.  So, Hooray! I got cable.  And Hooray, the guy came early and was done early.  I was going to run a work errand and be off to work.  But my car battery, which has been slowly dying, told me otherwise.

Off to Pep Boys I went to get a new battery and, while I was at it, brake lights since the police officer who pulled me over on Thursday gave me a warning and I don't want to tempt fate.  The wait was an hour and a half.  I emailed work and told them I was taking a vacation day since "hour and a half" in mechanic terms usually translates to "three hours."  It was actually two hours.  I got out of there unscathed, then ran the work errand (through West Hollywood traffic no less) and then decided to stop at Target for TWO THINGS.  

 A Million Dollars later, I left Target with a new vacuum (on sale), since (as stated on Twitter) nothing highlights your housekeeping failures like inviting a stranger into your home.  [UPDATE: Highlight of my Target visit was seeing this guy in the elevator.]  The new vacuum is awesome.  It made my fire-engine red carpet look like new.  Never loses suction? You bet it doesn't.  It sucks so well that it sucked up the power cord for the brand new, never used, HD-DVR cable box and shredded it.  

When I break things, I don't half-ass it.

I'm really lucky it didn't start a fire since it was still plugged in and one end of this was sparking.  The vacuum is still running great, btw.  Since I hadn't eaten the sandwich I brought home, I sat down to eat while thinking of what I can do.  I mean, I didn't want to call the cable company and tell them I destroyed the power cord on the first day.  I decided that Best Buy would probably have a replacement cord.  Surely I'm not the first idiot to do this.  But, lo, my friends at Best Buy could not help me.  They suggested...the cable store that I passed on Santa Monica Blvd in West Hollywood earlier. It was roughly 3:30 when the shredding occurred.  By the time I ate and got to Best Buy, 5:00.  I got to WeHo around 5:40 because, you know, the unbearable traffic.  The cable store closed at 5:30.  Then, I suddenly remembered there's a cable store on Cahuenga right by my house.  Stupid, Stupid, Stupid.  I drive by it every day!  I raced over there and they closed at 6:00.  I didn't make it.  

Back home, which still smells like burning rubber, I searched for cable cords online to see if there was an alternative.  There's not, at least not that I could find.  Guess who's going to the cable store after work?  

Today, I woke up with a sinus headache and barely made it to work with all of my clothes on.  I stopped at Starbucks for coffee and an oatmeal.  I left with coffee....my oatmeal is probably still sitting on the counter waiting for me.