Tuesday, January 30, 2007

We'll be right back after these messages.

I love commercials. You know how some people can tell you about every video that played on MTV during the 80's? I can tell you about commercials. I love them. I'm an advertisers dream. In fact, when I tape a show, I don't fast forward through the commercials, unless it's late and the show is LOST and I really just want to find out what happened.

So, with that in mind, and with nothing else to say, here are some commercials that are tickling my fancy lately:

Don't you want me, Baby?--How cute are those Chips Ahoy cookies in their little red convertible with their little seat belts singing along to their "Totally 80's" CD--until a dark shadow descends upon them and they are picked off one at a time by a ruthless killer. I love the look on the driver's face as he realizes what's happening a second too late. A thought occurred to me last night: What's going to happen to the car? It's going to plunge over that cliff. I can hear the highway patrol now, "There's no evidence of foul play, but it appears the passengers were eating cookies before they abandoned the vehicle."

Helpful Honda Salesmen--There's a new series of Honda ads in which people complain about dishonest car salesmen and the Honda salesman apologizes and ends up doing some dirty job around the house to be helpful. So the one in which the guy gets the bait-and-switch on a truck deal, he calls the dealer a tool. He actually says, "What a tool." (hee hee--he said "tool.") I don't know why, but "tool" used in a derogatory manner makes me giggle involuntarily. Roy, back me up here. We all know he means, "What a dick." I can't believe they used "tool" instead of "jerk" or something. I'm still giggling. Also, I love that he makes the Honda guy put together Ikea furniture.

Vons Super Bowl--This one will only make sense to Angelinos, unless there's a Vons sister store like Albertsons/Sav-On has Jewel/ Osco in the Midwest. Okay, so you know the commercial with the paper doll people preparing for a Super Bowl party? Listen carefully when the marching band comes out of the cooler and marches across the living room. I think it's supposed to be a tuba, but it totally sounds like the band has the walking farts. Oh, don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about. Farts make me giggle, too. I'm right there with you, Laurie. [If you really don't know what the walking farts are, listen to a Larry the Cable Guy CD--don't you dare judge me. Rednecks is funny.]

Vee Dub in da house--How great is Peter Stormare in those Volkswagen "Unpimp your auto" commercials? Rockin' da German engineering, yah? Volkswagen always has some great commercials, and I'm not just saying that because I drive one. Does anyone remember the Cabrio ad in which these 20-somethings drive at night to the backing music of Nick Drake's Pink Moon? It's beautiful. Or the ad when they were introducing the new Beetle convertibles to the tune of ELO's Mr. Blue Sky? I've been practicing making the VW sign with my fingers, but haven't quite mastered it yet. Plus in LA, it might get me killed.

Honorable Mentions:

  • The cell phone ad in which the Dad text messages his kids at the dinner table. The son's delivery is perfect.
  • The T-mobile ad in which the younger brother picks his sisters hot friends to be in his five. I like the mom's nod at the end.
  • The other T-mobile ads with Charles Barkley and Dwyane Wade (yes, that's spelled correctly), especially the one where the waitress thinks Barkley is his dad.
  • The Honda Element ad with the crab (I Pinch), and the newer one where the crab is jealous. Okay, I like the French penguin too. I hate the Element though. I mean, what's with that plastic door?
  • It's late now, but the Staples Christmas advertising with the panel of experts. I especially love Engerbert's winking and saying, "Take this to your mother."
  • The Cheez-It commercial in which the little girl explains how they get the big cheese taste into the tiny crackers. Her face at the end is one I make almost daily because people just don't get me. (again, Laurie, I feel you)

We now return to our regularly scheduled program.


MonkeyGurrrrrl said...

We have got to be related. LOVE the vee-dub commercials. That guy is amazing (and pretty hot, according to his imbd page). I love the fave five ("Maybe you should get uglier friends"), AND the one where the kid and his dad are fishing and he says, "Dad, I think I should get a phone" and the dad says "I think you should get a job". PERFECT delivery.

And even though (I think) you maligned it in an earlier post, and I hate Volvos and those what drive them, the one where the dad is picking up his (5/6/7) y/o and she's telling a story and just keeps talking and talking and talking. That is the WMG incarnate, I tell ya!

The Roy said...

1) I'll back you up there.
2) I want one of those white GTIs so bad. Maybe in 10 years. Or never.
3) http://mywebpages.comcast.net/xterraguy/VW-OhSnap.gif

The Roy said...

4) It doesn't matter how many good commercials run in a break, it takes one to make me hate TV for a week. During Christmas, did you guys get the ones for Garmin, with the woman driving around and the song "Where's shopping mall? There's shopping mall?" set to that bells song? Shit in my hat, that commercial filled me with the rage of a thousand suns. And the worst part is, I don't know why.

Ellen Bloom said...

I always cry at those Hallmark and long distance phone commercials....so poignant...sniff sniff.

Sachi said...

I love you.

Laurie Ann said...

Oh my God, Ellen, ME TOO! Oh, the one with the baby brother who's older brother is off at college. Weepfest!

And Monkeygrrrrl, I didn't malign that commercial. I love the commercial. I just maligned the costume designer. The little girl's clothes don't match. I did, however, look up the history of that commercial and they pretty much just let her talk--no script--through five takes. So her whole spiel is a culmination of everything she was talking about. The child is five years old, by the way.

miss kendra said...

i love the hot girls in the five commercial, because the dad is so awesome.

Frank said...

K, I've already started a blog to be able to 'hang' with you guys. I refuse to start watching TV to see these commercials you're all ranting and raving about.

Let's talk about NPR... ;)

Jennifer said...

two things...in the midwest vons is 'dominicks'

and my most memorable commercial:
when i first went to college there was an ad for the phone company where the two little boys got off the bus and it was raining and they were trying to call home to have their mom come get them and she was on the phone and so they couldn't get through to her (busy signal cause she didn't have call waiting...i'm ALWAYS going to have call waiting if i ever have kids JUST cause of this ad!) and were going to have to walk home and the bigger brother was taking care of the little brother making sure he had his hat on and stuff...those two little boys were EXACTLY like my two youngest brothers. I didn't have homesickness UNTIL I saw that commercial...then it made me cry EVERYTIME I saw it (i'm getting choked up just typing out the description and this was 15 years ago!!)

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