I need a trip to Baskin-Robbins

Yesterday some co-workers and I somehow ended up discussing one of their acquaintances, a woman who claims to have never experienced an orgasm. I know! We couldn't wrap our heads around it because said woman has quite an active sex life (just ask her). Since we were at work, we had to use euphemisms.

S__ said, "It's like having a sundae, but only eating the whipped cream, sprinkles and cherry. What's the point of a sundae if you don't get the ice cream?"
C__ and I agreed. I said, "Sure there are times when whipped cream and sprinkles can be quite satisfying, especially if you add a cherry, but I really like ice cream--multiple servings, if I can get it."

To which S replied, "Yeah, I know. But she's still really excited about going to Baskin-Robbins."

Up to my eyeballs in project ARRGGGH!

Crap! Crap, I say! I have spent the past two days helping out on a big--BIG--project that still isn't quite done and have had zero time to actually do my own work. Now, my work is all backed up and I'm never going to get caught up. Tomorrow we check up on what's missing and the whole thing should culminate on Thursday. I'm SO over it. I need a cocktail!!!
You know what the best part is? This is just the tip of the iceberg--just our little show for Great and Powerful Oz to say "We're working on it. We'll have it all pretty for you soon." Yippee!!!
Fortunately, by then we'll have this down to a routine and it shouldn't be a problem. For now, though, ARRGGGH!!

Don't wait up. Leave a nightlight on for me.

Classic TV Overload and The Roy ages

Thank you, KTLA, for your 60 hour marathon of old TV shows. My eyes are bleary from watching far too much television and it's still going. Was it worth it? I saw Erik Estrada sing "Celebration," so what do you think? My favorites have been the old cop shows like Dragnet and Highway Patrol. Oh, and the Partridge Family episode where Laurie gets braces and picks up radio signals from the radio her boyfriend, Mark Hamill, carries around. Good times.

Oh, while I'm here, it's The Roy's birthday (tomorrow, Nov. 26). HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

It's my party and I'll buy if I want to.

Happy Birthday to me!!

I just got back from Santee Alley with my friend Jaclyn, her mom Mary and Jax's friend, who I suppose I'll call a friend, Lindsay, where I bought two knock-off handbags (couldn't decide), cheap sunglasses, a wallet, and a ring all for under $100 (I have money to spare). Jax's mom speaks Spanish, so she got us some deals on the already cheap prices. Jaclyn got an awesome double-breasted coat for $19.99 (in purple, her favorite color), Lindsay indulged in some glamorous animal prints and Mary loaded up on gifts for the folks back home in Chicago. Woo Hoo! I love a good shopping day!

When I got home I had a package waiting from my Mom--a knitting book! Yippee! Plus emails galore from a bunch of online shopping places that made me feel loved ('cause I'm easy that way). I should have worn the pin Kelly gave me a long time ago that reads "It's my birthday. Who's buying?" but Lord knows what kind of offers I would have received downtown.

I'm heading over to Borders where I will enjoy a birthday discount of 20% then maybe I'll even treat myself to a burger and root beer float at Schwab's. Know why? 'Cause it's my birthday and I can do whatever I damn well please!! Now where's that scantily clad pool boy with my drink?

News Flash!

GIANT POLAR DOG INVADES SEASIDE VILLAGE!

Isn't he the cutest thing? It's a Maremma Sheepdog. In absense of real news, cute puppies are always the way to go.

Today is my niece's birthday. She's 12!!! OMG, how did that happen? She wasn't even born yet when I moved to LA. Dang!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MARY KATE!!!

I LOVE YOU!!!

[November 22nd is my blogiversary. Two years!]

Homesick

It snowed in the Poconos.

This is what I'm missing.

but not this

Can someone make it snow for my birthday? Pretty please??

I love when this happens

Today I had one of those days. Not one of those days, but a day when things went well. Really well. I had a meeting today and the following things happened:

• Coffee Bean had my Java-to-go packs ready well ahead of my reservation time and I was able to get an early start.
• I got to the meeting place early and remembered to make signs for the parking area indicating that this is the place for our particular meeting.
• The guy in charge was there early enough so that I could get the refreshments set up and have a leisurely cup of coffee.
• I remembered to bring everything I had to bring for the meeting.
  
• Jamie ran smoothly despite my paranoia that every little noise signals her imminent demise.
• I forgot to get gas but had enough to make it to the meeting and then to the gas station afterward.
• I pulled a Hail Mary play and righted several wrongs ('cause I'm a dumbass) that I had made.

I got a Thanksgiving card from my mom today. No guilt, just good tidings. Phew!

Oh, yeah, this is why I bought a car

Things on the bus today:

• Man who stared at me the whole ride from Sunset to Olympic.
• Man who got into a fight with the driver because he tried to rush the steps while folks were still getting off.
  
• The driver who shut down the bus and refused to let ANY of us on while the man (see above) called the Metro offices to complain about her. Then she finally let about three people on but shut the doors and zipped away.
• Dad giving his 4 year old son a Red Bull at 6:30pm. Good luck, tonight, Dad.
• Two drunks singing Marvin Gaye in the back of the bus.
• One of the drunks moving a few seats up and then peeing--yes, peeing--all over the floor.

Ah, yes. Go Metro indeed. I pick up Jamie tomorrow. Please, my precious green car, please last for a while.

Jamie is kicking my ass.

I called my mechanic to check on the car. It seems Jamie keeps blowing out the same spark plug coil, so he did a diagnostics check to see what was causing this. Mr. VW told me that my engine isn't combusting properly or something or other which will necessitate an engine overhaul or a new/used engine or something. Frankly, my mind when blank after the following conversation took place.

Me: Well, how much will that cost?
Mr. VW: (mumblemumble 15 mumblemumble times mumblemumble) 4350
Me: Is there a decimal in there somewhere?
Mr. VW (chuckle) No, I'm afraid not.
Me: HOLY SHIT!!

Clearly, I can't afford to pay Four THOUSAND dollars to repair my car. We decided to just replace the spark plug for now, even though it'll blow again in a few months, and in the meantime, I will look into dumping Jamie on some unsuspecting used car lot and getting a new vehicle. Shhhh...don't tell Jamie. I need her to last as long as possible.

Crappy Day; Great Mail

Friday was a bad day. We had an important but loooonggg meeting first thing in the morning and after I got out, it seemed like everything just went fast forward. Then I had a mini-meltdown in my office (someone moved my cheese) and didn't eat until after 3pm. VW hadn't called yet about my car. I had to help with an event on Saturday in Santa Monica, which meant calculating a commute, and I was just not a pleasant person. Then, I came home and found packages!!! For me!!
The first was my Harry Potter sock kit from Caren! It's great!!
Sunflowers! I love sunflowers. And look--Coffee and Candy!

mmm...Candy Corn...chocolate...(drool).






There's Berroca yarn, Brittany needles and Bunny Hop socks pattern. The stitch markers are great and Caren included a ball of yarn keychain.



The keychain was hard to photograph, but trust me, it's adorable.



And, as if that wasn't enough, I received a copy of Charmed Knits for my excellent snitch catching skills. I was sufficiently cheered up.
Thanks, Caren! Thanks D. Hallin of Minneapolis!

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say nothing was happening?

Son of a BITCH!!!! I was literally turning into the driveway at The Farmer's Market for my weekly Stitch N Bitch when Jamie, my cranky car, decides to buck and snort and--oh yes--flash me the check engine light. I knew what it was immediately because it happened before here and here. I nearly ran over pedestrians passing through The Grove only to have some asshat sit at the stop sign waiting for a message from God to tell him to move. MOVE! Finally, he moved, I turned left, paused at the first stop sign, paused at the red light at Fairfax, zipped up to Beverly and pulled over at the first parking meter on Beverly I could find (at Gennessee). AAA sent a tow truck, but he couldn't take me downtown with his truck because of the traffic (Don't worry; I don't get it either). He said I had to wait for the flatbed. "How long will that be?" I asked innocently. "About an hour." WHAT??? An hour??? Then Jerky McJerkinson tells me that I have the basic membership which only covers 7 miles. It's 9 miles to VW of Downtown at $9 for every extra mile over 7. I have $19 in my checking account. Nine times two is, let me see...gonna leave me with one freakin' dollar in my account. Fortunately, Junior, the flatbed driver, didn't charge me the extra miles. I should think not considering I had to wait so long. Oh, and the dealership closes at 9:00. Junior got me there in 25 minutes. Good job, Junior!

The gal at the dealership told me they were completely booked tomorrow and Saturday, so they may not even get to it until Monday or Tuesday. This sucks much because I have an event on Saturday--in Santa Monica. CRAP!!!! They'd better fix it free again. Why is Jamie doing this to me?

I'm a bad blogger

Holy Crap! Has it been a week? Well, you haven't missed a thing because I haven't done a thing. Well, I've done some things but nothing to write here about. Work is busy. I'm not sleeping properly so I'm exhausted when I get home and I've been falling asleep on the sofa again.

Saturday I did manage to walk around my neighborhood--went to Amoeba and Borders, rode the elevator to the 7th level of the Arclight parking deck only to be DENIED because of the AFI Film Festival staging area. Dude, I just wanted to take a photo of the sunset from a different view so my Mom doesn't get bored [Monday through Friday it's the same office building in every shot. I thought she'd appreciate the variety.] Instead, I had to take the shot from the 6th floor which has a netting or something on it, presumably to either block the harmful rays of the sun or to keep you from falling off the deck. It looked like I was in a cage. Nice.

I'll try to have something for y'all next week.

Not So Lucky, and No Strikes

We had a staff meeting tonight at Lucky Strike at Hollywood and Highland. I hadn't been there before and it was great to see the old Hollywood Star Lanes stars on the walls. We played on four lanes with teams of 11 people. I know. Crazy, right? I love bowling but rarely get to do it. I used to bowl a lot more back home and at the occasional Tower party. Who knew it was so physically demanding? One of my friends dislocated her thumb (I wince every time I think of it), although she says it's an old recurring injury. Another gal did something to her knee. I didn't see the injury occur, just the aftermath of her being on the ground and the hot paramedics taking her away. And I pulled something in my left thigh. I'm not sure what it was, but walking is painful and my game (not the best to begin with) went downhill from there. I hang my head in shame as I admit to bowling a pathetic 79. In my defense, I was bowling for three. One of my teammates had to leave early and another teammate recently had wrist surgery. While she did her best for the first five frames, her wrist was hurting too much to continue. So, two of our best bowlers and I took turns covering their turns as well as our own.


In other news, I got a letter from my mother in response to the first couple of sunset letters. Predictably, it was filled with guilt-inducing phrases such as "I guess you're getting your news from other sources, so I don't have anything to say" and "a post card doesn't take much time to write" and an inquiry as to whether I've eloped or "run off with Tami?" (my friend with whom I moved out here in the first place) Now, where would I run off with Tami to? Wouldn't moving 3000 miles away from our families constitute running off? And is this Mom's half-joking insinuation that I'm gay? [Not the first time, either--when I moved here with Tami 12 years ago, she asked if it was so we could "be gay together"] I knitted her a tiny heart from Mochimochi Land tonight when I got home to prove that I still love her.