Friday, May 11, 2007


You know those "Where does depression hurt?" commercials? Well, while I don't necessarily feel that I'm depressed, I see those commercials and I can relate. I'm feeling kind of blah lately. My apartment is a mess and I don't particularly care. I have gone to work without make up for three days this week, which is not usual for me. And I'm so tired all the time.

So with nothing useful to share I give you a short story--illustrated with finger puppets, 'cause that's how I roll.

One day in a random hallway at La Scala, probably headed toward the men's room, Dr. Frankenstein's creation stumbled upon Giacomo Puccini.
"Puccini Bad," he said. "Me see La Boheme. Me think Rent better."

"Eh, Frankenstein. Why you no lika my opera?" said the genial composer.
"Me no Frankenstein. Me creation of him. Me Modern Prometheus," said the cultured monster, getting irritated.
"Still, why you no lika my opera? Itsa considered one of my best works, " Giacomo insisted. "Whatsamatta, Frankenstein? Your bolta comin' loose?"

"arrrrrgggg! Stop calling me Frankenstein. Me no Frankenstein. Frankenstein asshole. Me very angry. Me think Verdi greatest Italian Opera composer. Me think Puccini a hack, " the creation shouted. "La Traviata kicks Madama Butterfly's ass!"
With that the angry monster began choking the surprised Italian.

"eegggkkkggaaggg...Frankie...your hurting me. I (gggaaakkk) can't (aaaacckckk) brea..." with those words, Giacomo Puccini slumped to the floor.
The Frankenstein monster, thinking he killed Puccini and would be even more of an outcast, fled to the Paris where he climbed to the top of the Eiffel Tower and tried to grab at passing airplanes, albeit unsuccessfully.

Sorry I missed Stitch N Bitch tonight. I had to make brownies for a friend at work.


Frank said...

{{{Laurie Ann}}}

Perhaps you can see your doc? You don't have to be ready to jump off a bridge to be depressed. (Although you don't have to be clinically depressed to feel what you're describing).

Feel better. You deserve it!

miss kendra said...

judging from this post, i'm guessing they were pot brownies. =)

miss kendra said...

the second half, i mean. the first half, well, i just empathize.

MonkeyGurrrrrl said...

:) Baby, as a LONG time anti-depressant connoisseur, I'm guessing you don't need 'em. Just by virtue of your sense of humor (you have one!) Having the "blahs" occassionally are completely normal (oh, to be normal...)

:) I see you, like I, hate it when people refer to Frankenstein's monster as "Frankenstein". Obviously, some people have not seen The Greatest Movie of All Time, Young Frankenstein.

Oatmeal, the Bandit said...

Melon, bad!

Uccellina said...

Genius! I'm sorry you're depressed. You made me smile, though.