Do not go gently into that good deal.

I still don't have any photos from Jamaica yet. Patience, Grasshoppers. When I do, I'll have them in a lovely Kodak Gallery that you can all peruse at your leisure (except maybe the embarrassing ones).

So, allow me to rant for a moment about my Court Reporting school and the havoc it has caused in my life this week.

I'm all for upgrading the system--it hasn't been upgraded since 1940 or so--but have some consideration for your student body, and while you're at it, how about a little communication. So, for those of you who don't attend my school, here's the deal. We had a pow wow with the owner and he told us of a new school building (woo hoo), which will be opening next spring, and a new program (can I get an "Amen"), which will allow us to build up speed at our own pace by connecting to an internet-based learning tool, etc, etc (I don't want to bore you non-court reporting folks). In order to use this tool, we were initially told, we would need an upgraded steno machine and the software to build up our own personal dictionary. We were told if we had DSL and certain computer specs, we could access it from home to practice. In school, we'd be going to the computer lab during our "tape" periods.

THEN...

We had another pow wow with the owner during which we were told that we would need the new machine, the software, and a laptop with certain specs, as we will be using these in class instead of the usual teacher-dictation method we've been using. They got us a great discount on all three components, oh, and by the way, we'll be starting this new program in the July quarter so you need it NOW. We filled out a questionnaire about what equipment we'd be needing, and that was the last I heard anything. I blissfully left for vacation.

THEN...

I returned from vacation and still didn't see a bulletin regarding the equipment. I saw a line of students waiting to talk to some office folk, though, and figured I'd ask. Sure enough, I needed to fill out a form to see if I qualify for financing from some outside company for the steno equipment, and then apply with Dell for financing for the laptop. Now, I may not have mentioned it before, but I'm a failure as an adult and have no money skills whatsoever, so my credit is crap. I'm not going to qualify for any of this financing, and quite frankly, I cannot afford another bill in my life. I'd like to pay off some credit cards. I'd like to improve my credit score. I'd like to move out of my apartment in the ghetto to a better apartment in a better ghetto.

I spoke with the office folk, who look at you and say, "Oh, gee...um, I don't know. You'll have to talk to Mark,"when you ask about other options. Mark is magic. Mark has some special deals. Mark apparently sells equipment from the back of a truck in an alley in the warehouse district downtown (or not). Mark is on vacation this week. ARRGGH! I have to come to school during our break next week to meet the mysterious Mark and work out a deal. Perhaps I'll be paying him "in kind". I'm not above it.

Okay. Rant over. Go back to what you were doing. I'm going to have a drink (or several) and wait until I meet with Mark before deciding that prostitution is the way to go.