There are things wrong with me

My priorities are clearly skewed.

First of all, I'm supposed to hang out with a boy this evening, and my gray hairs were sticking out (roots needed a touch up). I actually woke up early to dye my hair before work, so that when the gentleman caller meets me after school, I don't look like an old hag next to the 26 year old hottie.

Second, I come strolling in around 9:20 and the boss's boss, who is visiting today, said, "Oh, so you just come strolling in anytime you feel like it." I look over my shoulder at him and said, "Yeah, pretty much." I could have made up some excuse about traffic and SIG alerts or an early dental appointment, but I couldn't be bothered. I didn't even think about how bad that made the boss look in the eyes of his superior (can't control his secretary, how can he handle all this responsibility), or how bad I looked.

Third, my head is kind of woozy today. I'm thinking sinus pressure or fumes from Nice'n'Easy. Thus, instead of doing actual work for which I'm being paid, I read blogs, which led to links, which led to more fun stuff, which led to "Holy Crap! It's 2:14!!" Come to think if it, I was fine until I ate some rainbow-colored Goldfish crackers (One Fish. Two Fish. Red Fish. Gay Fish.) Maybe they were laced with something. I'll have to check it out.

Fourth, the store manager and I have spent the entire day so far trying to top each other in clever alternatives for butthole. He started it this morning with "mud whistle." It was all downhill from there. I won.

Fifth, even though I realize I've wasted most of the day doing nothing, I'm not really in a hurry to rectify the situation by rushing through the work I've yet to do.

Sixth, even though my head is woozy and probably doesn't need any more aggravation, I fully intend to tie one on tonight with the cute boy and possibly call in sick tomorrow (because tomorrow will surely be "commando day" otherwise).

I could go on and on but, really, I should get something done.

Did I mention it's Administrative Professionals' Day and I got SQUAT from the boss? I'm not bitter or anything, even though this is the second year in the row he has chosen to ignore this Hallmark Holiday, and even though I remember boss's day and his birthday and his wife's birthday and his daughter's birthday and his son's birthday.... Nope, not bitter.