Sunday, June 01, 2008

Conversation with Frau

[2:05pm--Hollywood, CA.--our heroine is napping on the sofa having woken up way too early, but having been productive despite getting caught in that Universal Studios fire traffic]

(knock, knock, knock)
Laurie Ann (rubbing eyes and opening door): Yes?
Frau: Is everything alright?
Laurie Ann: I was sleeping. What's up?
Frau: Where's the rent?
Laurie Ann: It's in the box.
Frau: I didn't see it.
Laurie Ann: I put in in there this morning...It IS the 1st, right?
Frau: Yes. How's the plumbing?
Laurie Ann: It's fine. Anything else?
[Frau doesn't answer]
Okay, then.

Our heroine goes back upstairs and cozies up to the sofa again.
(knock, knock, knock)
Laurie Ann (mumbling): oh, what now? (opens door) Yes?
Frau: Your rent is not in there.
Laurie Ann: I put it in there at 9:00 this morning. It's in there.
Frau (shuffling through several envelopes, agitatedly): It's not here! I have hers, his, Maria's...
Laurie Ann: It's in there. Open the box.
[Frau opens the box, our heroine reaches in and pulls out the envelope containing her rent and hands it to Frau Pissmeoff.]
Frau(sheepishly): Oh, it must have been stuck to the sides.
Laurie Ann: Yeah, not so much.

[heroine once again returns to her humble abode but now, thanks to Frau, is no longer sleepy. Or rather, still sleepy, but unable to go back to sleep.]

On the plus side, no mention of a rent increase or owing her for the water bill. Also, I was barefoot as I walked from my front stoop to the porch next door and it felt soooooo good to walk outside barefoot. I really miss being able to do that. Oh, sure I could still do it, I suppose, but this being LA and knowing that people pee or worse on these sidewalks everyday gives me the willies.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...
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MonkeyGurrrrrl said...

Dude. Technically, don't we have until the first (or second or third) *business day* after the 1st to pay the rent? That's just effed up.

Natalie said...

People are lame.

Kris said...

I am just (admittedly selfishly) happy to see a frau post. She cracks me up. Sorry, I apologize, I know, I don't have to live with her. Guilty pleasures indeed.

Anne-Marie said...

I love the Frau stories.

Also, I am trying to email you re: yarn but work don't let me reply through hotmail (they are also going to start spying on our internet use this week :( ). Will email tonight, but the general jist is 'Yes! Please! Thanks!'

carlita dee said...

Oh no! I was just about to get into some serious barefootism.